...and friends are friends forever...blah blah blah...
I'm not good at making friends. I'm throwing my problem out there into the realm-o-blog and I'm open to suggestions.
Lately I've been thinking a lot about other places, England for instance, or Pine Cove, or home. One of the things I was taught at Capernwray was that there are three basic human needs: 1. dignity 2. destiny 3. intimacy. We were told to be careful what we tell ourselves when there is a screaming unmet need in our lives. At this point, I lack intimacy. As far as I can surmise, this is why I've been longing for other places. In each of those places I have intimate friends. I'm not homesick. It's different. I miss people.
So I went and sat in my car tonight. (I don't know what it is about being in my car, but I can focus so much better. I feel invisible there...except I'm not, which makes for some awkward situations.) I ended up thumbing through my beat-up old copy of Run with the Horses by Eugene Peterson. Found this quote: (He's kind of paraphrasing what God says in Jeremiah 29:4-14)
"Quit sitting around feeling sorry for yourselves. The aim of the person of faith is not to be as comfortable as possible but to live as deeply and thoroughly as possible--to deal with the reality of life, discover truth, create beauty, act out love...You are in Babylon for a long time. You better make the best of it. Don't just get along, waiting for some miraculous intervention. Build houses, plant gardens, marry husbands, marry wives, have children, pray for the wholeness of Babylon, and do everything you can to develop that wholeness. The only place you have to be human is where you are right now."
Ok. How do I do that? That's what I want to know bloggies. How?
I want to live. I want to live here.
My attitude has been pretty passive. I want to make friends, but, in my experience, lasting friendships are NOT formed by sitting in a dorm room talking about classes and professors and recounting everything you ate that day. You have to have experiences. You have to have stories to tell. (I mentioned going to London for the weekend for a Switchfoot concert. No takers.) I've been kind of waiting around for experiences to happen, and they haven't yet. So at this point, do I just wait? Give it time? Do I need to do something else?

NOTE: (mainly to mom) I'm not miserable, or sad, or homesick. I'm fine. I'm just pensive.

So...if anyone has any suggestions on how a neurotic, introverted, beauty-loving-but-not-creating, music-lover/poser, Junior by age, Sophomore by credit, Freshman by social status, could make real friends, let me know. I really do want input.