I don’t know that I’ve ever really celebrated Advent.  Growing up, we had Advent calendars every year, and believe me, I celebrated that tiny piece of chocolate before school each morning.  (When you’re nine, there is something about eating chocolate before school that is exhilarating).  I don’t know that I processed that the anticipation I felt was a symbol of the Jews' anticipation for a Messiah, and a shadow of our anticipation for Christ’s return.  Chocolate never quite made me think of how Jesus would return and make all things new.  I want to do it differently this year, though.

I want to leap in the presence of the Lord, as John the Baptist did...

To await the arrival of Jesus with such eagerness that I physically yearn for him, as Mary did...

To draw nearer to the Savior as I wander, so I can present Him with gifts, as the wisemen did.

I want to recognize when my spirit aches for purpose and passion, that a new job is not the answer.  And believe that the “sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.”  I want to long for Christ’s return rather than for presents. 

Presence.  Presents.

And I am frustrated that I don’t feel the feeling I want to feel.  But I’m trying to remember that even my frustration, my numbness, is evidence of my need for His return.  Unfulfilled longing will not remain unfulfilled.  It is just not yet fulfilled.  I cannot stop believing that Christmas will come just because it hasn’t come yet.  It’s only December 7^th.  Just so, I cannot stop believing that Christ will come; it’s only December 7^th.  

He will come.  Feelings will be felt.  Longings will be fulfilled. 

And that is Advent.  That is hope.

Come, Thou long expected Jesus
Born to set Thy people free;
From our fears and sins release us,
Let us find our rest in Thee.
Israel’s Strength and Consolation,
Hope of all the earth Thou art;
Dear Desire of every nation,
Joy of every longing heart.

Born Thy people to deliver,
Born a child and yet a King,
Born to reign in us forever,
Now Thy gracious kingdom bring.
By Thine own eternal Spirit
Rule in all our hearts alone;
By Thine all sufficient merit,
Raise us to Thy glorious throne.

-Charles Wesley