Me: My employer informed me that there is an issue with my gender.

Them: We have you as Male.

Me: Well I’m not. I’m female. Always have been.

Them: Let me find out the procedure for this.

Me: Please do.


And the procedure includes me driving to Denton with my Birth Certificate to try to convince THEM, The United State Social Security Administration, that in fact I am, and always have been, female.


I’m going on Friday. I think I’ll wear pink.

I need to read more of my insecurity book...

The story you are about to read is true…allegorically. Some E’s have been changed to I’s to protect the innocent. I’ll let you guess which.  It may not make much sense...and I'm ok with that right now.


Two plus two equals four. Always. In every case. In every circumstance.

Let’s say you are trying to teach your delightful offspring that 2+2=4 because he has a math test on Friday. It’s Thursday night and the stupid...ahem…adorable little tyke still doesn’t seem to be understanding. He continues to answer the equation with a large, poorly written 6.

No loving parent waltzes into the classroom on Friday morning and matter-of-factly tells the teacher that the child will be writing “6” in answer to 2+2, but that he should not be counted off for it. There should be no consequence for this child because math is difficult for him, and he tries hard.

If there is a question on the test asking for a child to write his favorite number, then the large poorly written 6 is a wonderful answer, worthy of stickers and happy faces.

Sometimes you will be asked for your opinion and in this case there is no consequence, no right or wrong. But sometimes you will be asked for a fact, and in these cases if you get the answer wrong there are consequences and there should be. I don’t care if you are dyslexic, autistic, or illiterate, you are still wrong to have six where a four should be. You can teach the child to write his 6’s better, so that the loop connects perfectly and it fits perfectly on the line, we’ll call it “safe”, but it still isn’t the answer.

Safe six isn’t the answer when six isn’t the answer.

The child’s lack of understanding of the message does not mean the message is wrong.

It would be cruel not to teach six at all. Sometimes six will be the right answer. And he can write it with joy in his heart and a smile on his face. But not always. Sometimes when you write six there are consequences and there should be. (And, praise the Lord, sometimes there is grace when there shouldn’t be!)

The schools should probably teach safe sixes, but we should all be teaching where to put them. No matter how safe the six, the answer will still be wrong, and the child will be devastated at the consequences. He thought he did it right, but the red “X” on his paper will prove otherwise.

The safe six does not keep the heart from breaking.